Style isn’t shallow. Actually, it’s quite deep.
To have style means to take a risk. A risk to show yourself, to be seen.
Sure, you could wear the expected.
Some black pants, a pedestrian top, maybe a standard necklace.
You could up your game. Some of your people might not like it. You could get attention rather than shuffling around unnoticed or unremarkable.
Ah, but style takes serious strut! To show up as a woman in full, loving your look, commanding your powerful place in life. Now, that’s not shallow at all.
Yes, it could be superficial to only focus on looks to prop up our confidence.
Having a style that suits you isn’t about that. It’s deeper. It’s allowing yourself to show up fully expressed.
Sometimes, sure, we do use our outer layer and our adornment of ourselves to create confidence.
That’s ok too. Because we know there’s more to us than looks.
I’ve found when women show up authentic and punchy, exciting, different than everyone else, that’s when we feel pretty super great!
On Thanksgiving, one of my style clients sent a snap of her happy self wearing one of the outfits we’d selected together in her fall wardrobe capsule. The look on her face was priceless.
She is a very confident woman. An attorney, highly regarded in her field. However, like many of us, working from home behind a zoom screen had taken its toll. She’d let her wardrobe get dreary.
Her Thanksgiving style made me smile. She looked fabulous AND I could see it in the look in her eyes. The zing factor was jumping out of the picture. She was feeling happy and excited about how she looked, which reflected how she felt about her life in general.
Women are beautiful creatures, we don’t respond to drab, even if we think we don’t need to shine every day. We often let ourselves go to the point we don’t realize things have gotten really tired in our closets. And, consequently, in the way we carry ourselves out in the world. I’ve done it myself, ‘oh, this t-shirt I’ve had four years is fine, whatever. It’s comfortable.“ Right?
Baaaah. Not having it. To feel really special about the way we look adds another layer of confidence that is much more significant than skin deep.
For the longest time, I fought against my internal pull to be a stylist because I was so worried it would seem shallow, getting paid to shop. People made fun of my shopping all the time.
Now, I know for sure. It is not superficial to want to look and feel your best self.
Looking good is part, not all of it. And, looking good on the outside can give our insides a jumpstart when we’re not actually feeling it. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.
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